Main Characteristics and Values
Sandwiched between the shock-and-awe effect of the oldest and lacking the eternal cuteness and perpetual innocence of the baby, the middle child stands defensively. The middle child is completely self-sufficient with an overly developed id; which is both for their gain and demise. Self- preservation is the ultimate benefit from their determination to cast the shadow that dwarfs the shadows they feel they are in. But, such thorough independence is often destructive through making isolation comfortable, negative emotional outputs increasingly more negative, and projecting personal thought processes on the world itself rather than being open to different trains of thought. Often times, they carry with them a warped understanding of justice, believing they are always justified in a world that is inherently unjust to them (at least when they are younger). However, they also have large, compassionate hearts, sensitive to the beautiful and artistic things of this world. Furthermore, they are usually the more talented individuals, but fail to recognize themselves as such because the value of anything is determined via comparison to something or someone else rather than determined as individual unit.
Likely/ Unlikely to Persuade
“See how your sister is doing it? Do it like her.” This will never persuade a middle child! They want to be an individual that exists separately from the image of their siblings. They want to be innovative and different, but secretly aspire to the same good outcomes that come to their siblings. Appreciation and recognition are the means to the ultimate persuasion for a middle child.
Test Case: Attending a Play
The middle child could be persuaded to see a play for several reason. First, if there is a choice between a play and an orchestral performance, and the siblings want to go to hear the orchestra, the middle child will seize the opportunity to go against the grain and will therefore select the play. A second means to persuasion would be if the play exposed the plight of the middle child, and sided with them, justifying their cause. (For example, maybe a dramatization of Malcolm in the Middle?) They seek this understanding and self-concept, so a portrayal of such would be very persuasive.
Coming as the oldest of four boys, I can say that a lot of what you wrote lines up with my own family. As the oldest, I am still somewhat pointed to as the example (though this has deteriorated with the passing years) and the youngest of the four is immune to any and all inconveniences. The youngest of the four lives on a cloud and is hand-fed special privileges. As there are two middle children in my family, I have been able to view and compare the two throughout the years. The older is significantly more outspoken than the other, but the younger middle child is most certainly like the description you gave above. He is very independent and oftentimes stays aloof from the rest of the brotherhood so that he can do his own thing.
ReplyDeleteI AM the middle child in my family, and I can definitely say that I agree with the Likely/Unlikely to Persuade section. When I was younger, people would know me only as "Lynzi's sister" or "Kody's sister," and it bugged me so badly! As we've grown, things have leveled out and it's not the same being the middle child. But I can definitely relate with your post. Well done!
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