Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Lazy Student

As compared to the motivated student, the Lazy Student is one who, via errors of omission, seeks to actually receive less value out of the money spent on education (Similarity/ Difference &Contradiction). Why would a person pay money and then drag his feet along, begrudgingly doing the minimum amount of work possible? Perhaps, his funds are not his own (Cause/Effect). People who purchase things on the funds of another rarely value the purchased item (Genus/Species). Even worse, perhaps laziness has been eingrainedinto his character, as evidence by examples of a childhood filled with countless hours in front of the TV with minimal intellectual engagement (Past Fact/Future). Can we help him? Can we save the lazy student? Yes, after we identify him. First, we must approach his professors (Authority). As experts in the fields of education, they will be able to differentiate the lazy from inept. Second, with a list of viable candidates, we can poll the friends (witnesses). Those closest will be able to give accurate account of his character and disposition. Finally, we can study his work (Documents). A review of his fruits will confirm or deny the validity of the claims made by his teachers and friends. As countless cases of past students have proven, little effort combined with above average work denotes genius, while little effort combined with expected mediocre output indicates laziness (Precedent). With the Lazy Student identified, we can now help him. The approach is two-fold. Firstly, we motivate him to exert himself and see the fruits of the results, then repeat the process until it becomes self-perpetuating. As the Russians say, повторение мать учения (repetition is the mother of learning)(Maxims/Proverbs). Secondly, we appeal to heaven for divine intervention because at the end of the day some Lazy Students will only change by an act of God (Supernatural).

2 comments:

  1. Great uses of the topics of invention on a topic that I think most people reading this will be very familiar with. Perhaps more uses of testimony (whether that be witnesses or another type) might have increased the value of your argument given your topic, although I am intrigued with how you argued your points without much use of testimony.

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  2. This was hilarious. It's a concept that many of us are familiar with, yet do not want to admit. I have to agree with Spencer that while it isn't a requirement to use all the topics of rhetoric, a little more testimony (especially if it's your own, though I'm not saying it applies to you) would help to validate your essay. I had a lot of fun reading. :)

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