I am thankful for my bed, I am thankful for the heater, I am thankful for the opportunity for me to gain an education, I am thankful for the 23 year old minivan I get to drive around with pride, I am thankful for my professor's enthusiasm while teaching [repetition]. O beautiful Earth, I am grateful for the mountains that I gaze upon everyday bring me such happiness [apostrophe]. I now know through experiencing winter's harsh cold, that I cannot take the wonderful warmth that summers in California bring for granted [comparison]. I am indebted to my wonderful coat that keeps my shivering body, numb and stiff fingers, and goose-bump covered skin warm during the cold winters [description]. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for my computer that runs all day, helping me complete my assignments and notes [personification]. Let's not forget the long wait at Wendy's fast food joint to get a frosty at 1 am [oxymoron]! Most importantly I am thankful for my opportunity to go to BYU, the best university in the world [oxymoron (to some people, but not to me :)]. As I draw my conclusion to my gratitude, I think I am finished naming all that I am thankful for, but when I think about it more, I know I have much more that I can list [correctio].
I agree with BYU being #1! I think you can make a strong case for that. I really like the feel of your post. It has a very real voice to it, but it also implements good use of amplification which I feel is hard to do, at least it was hard for me in my post this week to create a good combination of the two.
ReplyDeleteI also see parallelism in the beginning. I liked your use of oxymoron, too- it was cleverly accurate.
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