Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Numbers and Slumbers

First Version: Numbers and Slumbers
Kairos:  I typically tell this story to friends when we're talking about dating experiences at BYU.


One Sunday afternoon, my roommate and I were sitting in our apartment when there was a knock on the door. Outside, I encountered a guy requesting to borrow some Tylenol--a friend of his had a headache, he said. I offered him use of my costco-sized ibuprofen, and he said he would return the bottle shortly.
A few hours later, my roommate and I decided that this was the perfect time to capitalize on a Sunday afternoon nap. We crashed on our living room couches. After about a half hour of blissful rest, there was yet another knock on the door. My roommate got up to answer it while I remained sprawled out on a couch, face pressed to the pillow in that weird in-between state of sleep and waking.
"Hi....I think I'm supposed to bring this ibuprofen to you guys? I hope I have the right apartment"....
Through my blurred contacts, I saw a guy that I didn't recognize standing outside our door. My roommate glanced over at me.

"Yeah, that's mine, thanks, hope your headache got better..." I mumbled. (I don't know why I said that. I don't even know if it was his headache!)

"Yeah, thanks for letting us borrow it! Maybe I can take you out on a date sometime to make up for it."

Even in my half-aware state, this seemed weird. After all, I've never met the guy before. So, in the manner typical to my awkwardness, I said "um....okayyyy?"

"Sweet! Let me give you my number..." (insert moment where the guy realizes that I'm totally asleep) "actually...maybe I should get yours", he finished.

About 15 minutes later, I woke up for real.
"I just had the weirdest dream!" I laughed as I recounted the experience to my roommate. It was all well and good until I looked at my phone.
Hey this is ben I just dropped by. Just let me know what days you are free.


And that's why I shouldn't be exposed to the outside world when I'm tired.

338 Words

Second Version: Why Sleep is More Important than Boys
Audience: My grandmother, who keeps trying to set me up with her piano students

I was completely asleep on the couch, comfortably capitalizing [alliteration] on a Sunday afternoon nap. My face was pressed tightly against the pillow, my hair flipped across my face: the very picture of rest. [definition]

Only a few hours earlier, a young man had shown up at my apartment door, requesting to borrow some Tylenol--a friend of his had a headache, he had said. I had quickly obliged, and he said he would return the bottle shortly. Since then, I had gone visiting teaching, made banana bread, and planned out my week--I felt weak, [paranomasia] and so sleep was my next priority.

You know when you're in that weird state between sleep and waking? When you can kinda hear what's going on, but can't control your interactions with it? It's happened to me before, [precedent] and that's the frame of mind that I was in when the doorbell rang. My roommate got up to answer the door, and there stood a guy holding my Tylenol. Through blurred contacts, I saw my roommate take the bottle from him, and then there was a voice echoing across the room. The only words I could pick up didn't seem to make any sense.

"Thanks.....date.....number?"

Paying attention? That, I was not. [anastrophe] So I did what any rational, sleep-deprived human being would do in this situation [contraries]: I latched on to the one phrase I could respond to (which happened to be "number") and rattled off what I felt to be the appropriate response, and rattled of my digits.

"Great! I'll text you!" was the last thing I heard before I completely back asleep.

I woke up, confused and amused at having such a dream, and laughed as I recalled the experience to my roommate. Unfortunately for me, my roommate laughed as well--"Katelyn, that wasn't a dream. I saw the whole thing", [witnesses].

All it took was a glance at my phone to corroborate her story. Awkward much? But it's okay--I had a fantastic nap!

335 Words

 


5 comments:

  1. Your story made me laugh out loud! That was so funny! I think the first story was more entertaining in that it was what actually happened. It seems that the raw stories we tell are the most interesting.

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  2. Your story illustrates the power of rhetoric and the audience hearing what they want to hear. This young man should have realized your were sleepy and not taken advantage of getting your number, but he heard what he wanted to hear: a yes and 10 digits.

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  3. So funny Katelyn!! I really liked your revision. I liked the other details that came out in that version.

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  4. I was waiting for this story. Thanks for the strategy.

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  5. Eli, I beg of you, don't try this at home: lest you leave your victim confused and concerned with their mental health upon awakening.

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